Two Pents the Richer

Midnight in the Park

2008-05-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

Just returned returned from a midnight stroll at the dog park with my bitches, and I'm left with a thought and a gesture.

The thought:

Forget all this political nonsense and enjoy yourself. Today's American political scene is designed simply to agitate you and scare you into voting. Forget it. Go play. Nothing you can do is going to change a thing at this point; America is a has-been nation, and it'll certainly bottom-out before it ascends once again. It's the way all cycles operate. (Just ask any alcoholic, you know?)

If you really want to "change" something or "help" someone then start a foundation, adopt a stray pet, take in a homeless woman and her daughter, risk everything and build a business that employs hundreds of people, giving them a lifeline. But DON'T think you're changing a damn thing just because you're one of the few idiots left that actually buys Hilary's tired act, Obama's bullshit, or McCain's meaningless bromide.

Forget about the billion-dollar industry that is American politics today, and instead focus on your immediate environment, on the people you love, those you call neighbors, the places you want to go, the body you want to nourish and build.

The gesture:

As well, here's a simple but grand recipe for all you juicers. I stumbled across it the other day and fell in love with it.

Springspire

We want a medium-sized coffee mug for this one.

Then, juice in this order (because the apple juice tends to settle):

One large lemon, peeled
1.5 cups strawberries
One pink lady apple, diced into four pieces

Enjoy!

Otherwise...

Stay inspired

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Stars Without Stripes

2008-05-08T11:14:00.000-07:00

Americans consume more than one million chickens per day! I’ll bet that’s more chickens eaten per day than apples consumed per day. In addition, Americans eat more than 200,000 cows per day and almost 250,000 pigs per day. That’s a lot death, a lot of torture, and a lot of horror each day. And, interestingly enough, Americans, by and large, revel in that horror, anxious for yet another dose of it within mere hours.

Remember: We are what we eat. You eat death? You are death; you are disease, you are illness, you are degeneration—like it or not.

I see today’s America as this: It’s that scrawny little dude that walks into the convenience store clad in black concert t-shirt, stone-washed jeans, and Nike high-tops, hair feathered down the middle, and a black Trans Am with gold eagle painted upon the hood awaiting his return in the parking lot.

You see, the U.S. is little more than a has-been nation today. And, deep down, you know that, even if you won’t admit it out loud.

Pet Peeve of the Day
Men that refer to grown women as “girls.” It’s a bit creepy, don’t you think? In that closet pedophile way.

Until next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Pet Peeves

2008-05-03T23:01:00.000-07:00

This week’s pet peeves:

• When people clap in a movie theatre. Applause are meant to be heard by the performing artist(s). Yet, we’re in the Midwest while Robert Downey Jr. and the rest of the Iron Man cast are in LA. Get it????

• When Internet marketers market internet marketing products to other internet marketers hoping to market internet marketing products to yet more internet marketers.

• When obese people working at natural foods stores insist upon giving fit people that shop at such places nutritional advice. I promise not call you “fatty” if you promise not to act like you’re “slim,” OK?

And, a special thanks goes out this week to the Beach Book Festival Awards committee for deeming the Bee Balms & Burgundy audiobook worthy of first place in their “best summer reads” awards. Thank you!

Until next time...

Stay safe.

NP

###

Birthday Thanks!

2008-04-25T15:13:00.000-07:00

Thank you for all the birthday wishes!! I can’t believe how many I’ve received. It’s cool, but it still amazes me. I guess we have a lot more traffic and readers than we had a year ago. So…

Anyway, I wish I knew all of your birthdays so I could return the favors in the coming months. (LOL) Now I’ll spend the rest of the year feeling guilty!

Thanks a ton.

Your metaphorical servant for life

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

An NPoll

2008-04-25T14:49:00.000-07:00

To all you Mac users (and fellow dog lovers): What do you think would happen if Fetch (pic here) and Alfie (pic here) met???

Just curious.

Get This - Survey Results - GlowDay.com

Thanks for playing.

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Biz Ethics

2008-04-25T13:39:00.001-07:00

Today’s lesson, my child, is the rudimentary principle of “business ethics.”

Rule #1: No matter where you work—Canada, Costa Rica, America, the Internet, on a street corner, in a mega-mall, or amid an ivory tower—the business world does not cry for your failures, and it is not an experiment in humanity; it doesn’t change diapers or fill formula bottles or drive a minivan; it isn’t going to watch Joey’s soccer games or teach little Nichole how to execute a proper pirouette. The business world is not a pseudo-sensitive vegetarian with bounties of latent insecurities.

No. In truth, the business world is a saber-toothed tiger that hunts its prey with no regret, kills it with precision, and then devours it with fervor.

If you can’t deal with that—if you’ve convinced yourself that you will, even if your life depends on it, get the business world to enroll in a sensitivity course or check itself into an Adlerian clinic—you’d best not enter the realm…ever.

Instead, go work for a charity and put your labor where your mouth is, for a change.

Otherwise, leave the savvy players to play—to play the game as it should be played.

Until next time...

Stay safe.

NP

###

Winter Reads

2008-04-20T14:48:00.000-07:00

Each quarter, I give a recap of the books I read the previous quarter. While I didn’t have a lot of time this quarter, due to marketing tasks, I did manage to read a handful of books. Here’s my Winter 2008 list:

Memories of My Melancholy Whores; Gabriel Garcia Marquez
- I don’t think he’s the “writer” he’s reputed to be; I don’t think the translation was all that good (Edith Grossman). But I did like the laid-back, old-timer storytelling.

For One More Day; Mitch Albom
- Having recently lost my father, I knew this book would be a different read. For a mainstream bestseller, I do think Albom is better than most. A good, earnest read.

From Worst to First (non-fiction).
- I loved this book, simply because it was all about my beloved Twins. (Well, and the Atlanta Braves as well, but…)

All I Want for Christmas; Nora Roberts
- I’ll never understand the fascination with Nora Roberts; in my opinion, she’s nothing but a Harlequin romance writer that’s gained some exposure. She’s cheap, she’s lazy, she’s overrated. I thought this book sucked, but I had to see what all the fuss is about. Bad move.

Dubliners; James Joyce
- Awesome. Being 50% Irish, I couldn’t help but love this story. It’s always wonderful to read a classic (Hemingway, Emerson, Fitzgerald) that isn’t over-hyped or overrated. Joyce is great, and Dubliners is his best.

That’s all I had time for this winter.

Until next time…

Peace & Luv

NP

###

For Free

2008-04-19T09:42:00.000-07:00

The world (or Internet, for that matter) is filled with schleps looking for free novels, free eBooks, and free audiobooks. Just run a search on “free romance novels” or "free audiobooks" or "free stories" and look at the number of sites catering to these fools.

The people typing these keyword phrases daily back up their slacker’s gluttony with slogans like, “Everything online should be free!” or It should all be open source.”

Yeah, whatever. Go back to Berkley and recite your poetry on a street corner; go save a whale, beatnik.

Ever hear the phrase “you get what you pay for”? Precisely!

The reason certain writers offer their novels or stories for free? Because, well, they suck. That’s right: They can’t write in my league…or Grisham’s league…or Vince Flynn’s league…or Nicholas Sparks league…or Stephen King’s league.

The reason any writer would offer his or her work, in its entirety, for free is because he or she sucks. It’s that simple. Any novel offered for free is worth just that—nothing!

Don’t believe me? Next time you need your spleen removed, the next time you need car insurance, the next time you want to feast on that whopper or attend that movie or take that vacation…

Try doing it for free!

Stay real.

NP

###

Economic Nonsense

2008-04-17T09:30:00.000-07:00

While the housing market tanks, and while many U.S. corporations continue to move offshore for either cheaper labor or tax advantages, you will continue to hear rubbish about “recessions” and “economic crisis”—you’ll be forced to choke on Keynesian nonsense day after day after day.

Want the truth? Here’s the truth:

• Thanks to sheer gluttony, the U.S. housing market, for the past decade or so, has been so vastly overpriced the Common Man has had to leverage himself five to ten-fold just to put a roof over his head. At one time, up until the late 1970s, one could purchase a home for 150% to 200% of his/her annual salary. Today? Ouch. Easy credit (freshman in college now get Visa cards with $5,000 limits!!) and “real estate speculators” have turned housing not into a necessity but a sport. The current market correction is not only inevitable but also good.

• While the typical American career person has seen, perhaps, a 10% increase in his or her wages over the past five years, his or her fuel charges to and from that career have tripled! (Why do we ship Alaskan and Texas oil abroad rather than utilize it “at home”? Why do we not import Alberta oil to any real degree? Why not Venezuelan oil? Why do we instead import a vast majority of our oil from the Middle East—from halfway around the world???)

• Whenever war is used to “spring” a nation from economic woes to the promised life, that cycle will, at some point, run its course, no matter how long the war itself lasts. Just study the Vietnam War for evidence of such.

So, turn a deaf ear to the nonsense, the bullshit, and the rubbish of a has-been nation in self-inflicted peril. Forget about “the Fed’s adjusting interest rates”—the idiot’s guide to economic stability—“housing starts” (another “economic barometer” based in backwards-ass idiocy; instead, a focus on “mortgage payoffs” and/or home foreclosures would be much better economic indicators), and job gains/losses (the most ambiguous, misleading, and manipulated statistic in American history), and instead think like a logical, neutral adult.

You’ll save yourself the headache and nausea.

Until next time…

Peace, Luv, and Prosperity

NP

###

Nephew Billy

2008-04-14T14:40:00.000-07:00

I have no children. I have no urge to be a father—ever.

But I do love being an uncle…most days, at least.

My nephew turned ten a couple weeks ago. For his birthday, amongst other things, he received $100—five 20s—from his grandmother.

“Billy” cherished the gift. For our little Aries boy, self-reliance is a must, and having a roll of dough always enhances one’s opportunity for self-reliance.

Yet, self-reliance wasn’t his only objective. It seems puppy love was as well. You see, Billy’s little friend, “Suzie,” comes from a fragmented home; dad’s a boozer, and mom’s over in Iraq fighting someone else’s war. Since daddy digs the bottle more than he does accruing stamps on his Subway card of life, adorable little Suzie often gets left behind.

Not this time, Billy thought. With plans for several students to go skating at the rink on Friday evening, Billy was in a chivalrous mood. An all-too-shy kid towards the little ladies, he saw this as an opportunity to indirectly show Suzie how he felt about her.

After reciting his lines again and again all morning, he approached Suzie in the lunch room. In demure manner, she greeted him. In equally demure manner, he asked if she was going skating “with everyone” on Friday night. She studied the cream-white ceramic tile as she rocked back and forth on her tennis shoe heels. “No.” She continued to study the floor. “I can’t. I don’t have enough money.”

Billy knew, through hearsay, that this is why Suzie never made it to the rink on Friday nights. But he was now ten, much wiser than a few days earlier, and certainly quite a bit wealthier. He dug deep into his pocket and retrieved the roll of twenties. Turning his back to Suzie, he crouched over the roll and peeled the rubber hand from it. He eased a twenty from the roll, slid the rubber hand back onto it, then stuffed the roll into his pocket. He turned to Suzie, who, with wide eyes, hung on his every word.

“I don’t want you to have to stay home.” Billy stuck his arm straight out. The twenty dangled from his fist. “So please take this and come along.”

Suzie eyed the fist.

“Take it, please.”

Suzie continued to stare at the fist, hands deep in her pockets.

“It’s a lot of fun. And you deserve to have fun.” He nodded toward the fist. “Please.”

Suzie looked to Billy.

He nodded toward the fist again.

She eased her hands from her pockets and, open-palmed, raised one to Billy’s fist. He let go and the twenty fluttered to her hand.

Billy smiled, “See ya Friday,” and sprinted across the cafeteria, where his friends awaited him.

Needless to say, from my last report, Suzie’s dad drank the twenty and she was a no show at the rink. But, the kid was brilliant.

Raw Recipes

Here's one worth trying, especially as the weather warms.

Raw Chocolate Ice Cream

• Two cups dates
• One cup cashews
• Three cups purified/spring water
• Two three tablespoons raw cacao powder

Just blend then freeze.

Interesting Fact:

Did you know…

That all polar bears are left-handed?

Stupid Quote of the Week:

Since it’s now baseball season once again, I offer you this dandy:

"I love home openers, whether they're at home or on the road."
- Hall of Fame Catcher Yogi Berra

That’s it for now. Until next time…

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Bored Housewives

2008-04-08T15:46:00.000-07:00

I love women; generally speaking, I revere women. I’ve long been a supporter of the aspiring career woman. She turns me on. Anyone close to me will tell you I put women on an ideological pedestal. I have for years. That’s my life; that’s my view; that’s my right. And, quite likely, I offer the following in utter respect to her, with few other motives.

NO MORE BORED HOUSEWIVES POSING AS COMPETENT PROFESSIONALS!!

That’s right. After three years—with the help of a woman nonetheless—I’ve come to the conclusion that many women in today’s Internet “workforce” are but bored housewives posing as competent professionals. It took me three years, thousands of dollars in wasted wages and expenses, and thousands of hours better spent with a true professional—to realize most women out there today are but bored housewives posing as competent professionals.

No more!

You want to be a housewife? Revel in it, darlin’; become mother of the year. But stay out of the biz realm. Sell all the trinkets you want from your hobby site, but don’t pretend that you know the working world. You have no business here, and you only make yourself look foolish.

Listen, women have, for years, chosen one of two things: career or motherhood. Now, as much as you may want to be a New Millennium Chick, as much as you may “want it all,” in reality merging the two rarely works. And it NEVER works when you’ve chosen—instead of going directly into the workforce out of high school and sacrificing your ability to breed for at least a couple decades, or gaining a college degree and then applying yourself to career for thirty or forty years like your average man—to breed and rear first and THEN enter the workforce.

And, to do so, to be so arrogant that you believe this realm, the corporate realm, is but a game that any under-experienced, undereducated soul with a monitor and mouse can enter is nauseating.

You want to breed and raise little rabbits? That’s great. You’re probably a hell of a mother, and that’s admirable. But don’t pretend that you can do, on a moment’s notice and part-time, what your fellow female career woman has spent her entire life learning and perfecting. Don’t give us that shit. You may well be a star mother, but she’s a star OUT HERE! Respect that, for Christ sake.

I didn’t create nature’s laws; I didn’t handicap you with a womb. But hear me when I say this: Learn your boundaries and save us all the headache!

###

Let's Play Ball!

2008-03-31T14:45:00.000-07:00

Major League Baseball (as a whole) begins its regular season today—Opening Day! Man, I’m so glad it’s back. Now, if we could just get rid of Old Man Winter here in the Midwest, I’d be even more grateful. Go Twins!

So, at 4:30 this morning, I finally finished a sixteen-hour day in which my trusted audio mixer/editor Jesse put the final touches on the Bee Balms & Burgundy audiobook. I then came home and converted all files and arranged them onto three discs, as well as created the artwork for the CD labels. Tomorrow, finally, we deliver them to the duplicator, for a Thursday delivery on the first batch. It’ll also be available as of Friday in downloadable format on my Web site, www.NelsonPahl.com. Right on!

Which brings me to me final point. I’ll be taking part in my first book fair this weekend. (I’m really excited about it.) We’ll be at the Arkansas Literary Festival in Little Rock on Saturday and Sunday, in the fair’s open-air section. If you’re in the neighborhood, we’d love to meet you.
Until then…

Peace & Luv

###

Rotten Eggs

2008-03-23T21:52:00.000-07:00

Two thoughts this evening:

1.) Easter is just another excuse for the Christian Coalition to close down all things America for an entire day.

2.) Leftist Logic: On Easter, although it typically closes at 10:00 p.m., my local Whole Foods store purposely closed at...8:00 p.m.

Stay safe.

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Heartbreak Hotel

2008-03-18T23:43:00.000-07:00

While out with my gal-pal this past weekend, an elderly gentleman cornered me. He subsequently talked my ear off for some forty-five minutes—until I simply had to leave and go home.

Why is it that America’s senior citizens, those that are single, are now so lonely? Having traveled abroad extensively in my life, I know this just isn’t the case in most other nations. When one is widowed or divorced in most foreign locales, he or she still has plenty of family and friends around. But in the U.S.—where work and career are placed above socializing and family on the priority totem pole, and where no one respects their elders in this day and age of born-again free love and unbridled hedonism—a significant minority of today’s senior citizens are heartbreak-lonely. And, truth be told, it breaks my heart.

The gentleman that spoke to me is sixty-four. He fought in Vietnam. He earned a purple heart after taking a few rounds to his leg and back in an attempt to rescue buddies, his buddies all butchered in the same jungle massacre. After he returned to the ‘States, he got married. A couple decades later, he got divorced. He had four children with the woman; they all live out-of-state, scattered throughout the Midwest, with busy lives. He never remarried and now resides in a senior care center. He gets to work out in the facility’s fitness center for free, he says. He looks like he uses it three to four times a week. He doesn’t drive anymore, so he rides his bike everywhere, even in winter. Saturday nights are his night out, at the bowling alley; it’s the one night of the week he’s allowed to get out and socialize, to actually speak to someone outside the senior home, in the real world.

I wish I had the courage to walk away the moment I became bored with his biographical monologue—thirty seconds after he began it. But I didn’t; I couldn’t. Instead, I stood there, with gal-pal in hand, and pretended to hang on his every word…until we shut the place down together.

At least my mom would’ve said, “Job well done, Nels,” even if I was bored to tears and getting more restless by the second. I just hate to think of anyone being so lonely. I fucking hate it.

###

Babble Fish

2008-03-06T16:12:00.000-08:00

OK, I'm going to do my best to keep a consistent schedule here; I read somewhere recently that it's the best way to "market myself." Lovely. So, how about Thursdays and Sundays?

Right. Like I'll be able to keep a schedule. Anyway...Perhaps I'll simply hire a new publicist to handle the "marketing of myself," huh?

Today's thoughts and tidbits:

➢ My Bee Balms audiobook is done but not yet packaged properly. Bummer. I'm anxious to get it into your hands.

➢ A woman at my neighborhood natural foods store (yes, I literally have a neighborhood natural foods store) has been busting on me all week—in typical Baby Bummer condescending manner—for the amount of apples I eat per day. (Like four or five.) You see, I stop there each day on my way home from the dog park; I like my food fresh, so I choose to shop each day. Yet, each time I step into my friendly natural foods co-op, it's almost like I have a salvage lot-magnet attached to my ass and Baby Bummer Beast has a gut full of cast iron. After she inevitably hunts me down, she blasts me for buying so many apples, thinking that her root canal-like sarcasm is funny day after day. (I know, good business, huh?) The irony? At five three, she weighs no less than a couple bucks and looks to be in desperate need of some fiber herself. Damn troll...

➢ A little bummed to hear that Venezuela and Colombia may well end up warring soon. Just what the world needs: another "skirmish" to glorify. Coffee and cocaine, man. That's all the world needs to be happy.

➢ Just found out that we’re going to be at the Printer’s Row Book Fair in Chicago—the nation’s second largest book fair after LA—June 6 & 7. We’d love to see you there.

➢ This Saturday we move our clocks forward and capture another precious hour of evening sunlight. Can’t wait!!

➢ Had my first three acupuncture sessions this past month. I think it might be the greatest thing ever invented. Wow!

➢ I was asked by the Bronte Prize committee, in preparation for their 2008 award announcement in June, to give a signed copy of Bee Balms & Burgundy to...the 2008 winner! (LOL) Now, that's a little absurd, don't ya think?

➢ I was reminded again this week why I worship women (at least Gen X, Gen Y, and 'Tweener women, that is). So, to each of you, I offer a fond "thank you for being so lovable"; you're a goddess. Now, revel in it.

Until next time...

Stay safe.

NP

###

Eights

2008-02-25T23:41:00.000-08:00

I was listening to XM8 today, during a break from my next book and remodeling my house, simultaneously. As I relived my youth (in the second-greatest decade in American history, next to the fifties), I had a few questions (eight, to be exact) relevant to the decade.

1.) What was pop music's best male voice in the eighties? (My answer would be Simon LeBon, hands down.)

2.) Who was the coolest rock star of the era? (My answer would be Michael Hutchense. In fact, although he died while chasing a taboo form of orgasm, I'd say he was the coolest to ever live.)

3.) Best chick-fronted band of the eighties? (For me, The Motels and Bananarama.)

4.) What was the decade's best film? (I'd say The Untouchables, even though Tequila Sunrise might be my favorite from the decade.)

5.) What was the decade's best television show? (Because it paved the way for damn near every drama now on television, I'd say, without hesitation, Miami Vice. Best sit-com would probably be The Cosby Show, as it too paved the way for much of today's sit-com realm.)

6.) Biggest farce of the eighties? (While most Gen Yers will point to the skinny pink ties and big hair, I'd have to say that the biggest farce of the eighties was the fame, albeit momentary, of one Kip Winger.)

7.) What was the coolest/hippest American city in the eighties? (While it probably was LA or Miami, I'd say Chicago, just because I saw it first-hand.)

8.) Best scandal? (The Iran Contra, Granada Invasion, Savings & Loan, and Junk Bond Market fiascos were choice. Yet, I'd have to go with the absurdity of the Panama Invasion and its 2100 civilian deaths. Why, really, WHY do we not hear more of this massacre in our political history and films??? It was beyond ruthless; it was beyond corrupt.)

Have a great week.

NP

###

Tedious Tuesday

2008-02-19T10:36:00.000-08:00

A few thoughts and tidbits:

* We've entered yet another "cold snap" this week in the Upper Midwest, our sixth such "snap" in the last six weeks. When, indeed, does a "cold snap" no longer qualify as a "snap" or a "spell" and simply become a "really shitty winter"???

* I'm so glad pitchers and catchers have finally reported. Let's wrap up hockey (Just hand the Stanley Cup the Red Wings already) and basketball (Crown the Celtics champs today), along with winter, and get on with the greatest game on earth—steroids, HGH, lies, gluttony and all. Go Twins!

* Saw Fool's Gold and Jumper this past week. Both good films, in my opinion. Of course, the woman with which I attended Fool's Gold tingled below the belt every time Matthew M. flexed his bare chest. Then again, seeing a petite Alexis Dziena in bikini, spread wide and with harpoon between legs, lathered me up a bit as well, so...

* Did you know that the average American is literally rotting from the inside out? Pretty sick when you think about it. (Especially if you're one consuming plenty of raw fruits and vegetables and cleansing himself/herself internally on a regular basis.) Think about that the next time you make love to or indulge in oral gratifying encounters with your mate. Is he or she in fact rotting and decaying from the inside out?

With that in mind, here's a simple little green smoothie recipe sure to not only cleanse you but satiate you as well:

* Two diced mangoes
* One pint diced pineapples
* One cup kumquats
* Seven large kale leaves sheered from stem
* 1.5 litres of purified water
* Mix into oversized blender pitcher then blend.

Nurse that all day and see what happens.

~

Deadpan Alley

Johnny races into the house from the school bus, bawling his little eyes out. “Mommy, all the kids on the school bus say I have a big head.”

Mommy squats in front of him. She wipes a few tears from his cheeks, and then hugs her little boy. “Johnny, sweetheart, you don’t have a big head.” She pats little Johnny on the back. “You have a hideously deformed head. The other kids are just trying to protect your feelings."

~

Look for the audiobook version of Bee Balms & Burgundy February 28.

Until next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Winter Wasteland

2008-02-10T18:09:00.000-08:00

OK, so, it's -312 degrees today in the Upper Midwest, the Siberia of America.

God, I hate winter. Even though I'm a former FIS World Cup skier, I...hate...winter!!! I need to move closer to the equator, man. Perhaps the mountains just outside Panama City, Panama. Yeah, that'll work. But this shit...no thanks anymore.

Which brings me to another point: Why are people here so ignorant? A woman I talked to the other day has always wanted to move to Denver. But, she said, "I love the four seasons, so I stay here." What??? People in the Twin Cities have been sold a bogus bill of goods; everyone in Minnesota believes the press when they say it's a great place to live, that it's Utopia. Why? It's -312 degrees all winter; traffic's a bitch; crime's on the rise yet again; ninety-nine percent of the population is, on average, ninety-nine pounds overweight; and the state boasts one of the highest property taxes and income taxes in America. For what? Where's the weather? The jobs? The tax incentives? The beach? The damn mountains??? (Not to mention those cherished "four seasons"? As far as I can see, it's winter for eight months, then summer for four.) And the "culture" we're "renowned" for...please. We don't even have a regional, touring dance company! Even Winnipeg has a touring dance company, man.

I had to tell the woman that there are four seasons in Colorado as well. But, instead of maple reds, you get aspen yellows. "Oh, really? I didn't know that." How the hell could you when you believe everything some sheltered, biased idiot on the radio or TV tells you about this hell-hole. At least I have the excuse that I moved back to look after my parents. Now, my father is dead, and I wonder: How fast can I get out of this place???? I'll openly say it at the risk of alienating certain readers: I hate the Midwest with zest! It's flat, damp and cold, and really fucking gloomy.

I also read today that 82% of all Americans will remain their entire lives near the cities in which they were born. Wow! Double wow!! That's kind of sad. I mean, that makes me wonder how we ever discovered the Wild West. Really, that's absurd when you think about it. I've seen 22 countries and more than 300 cities. I've lived in eight different states. I STILL feel like I haven't seen enough! But, the rest of my family is true to that 82%, so...it must be correct.

Anyway...I've provided a link herein to the first chapter of a book I'm currently penning called Nerve Gas. It's a social satire that takes place in Denver. It's got a bit of profanity, vulgarity, and all that good stuff. But, I know it'll be highly entertaining when done. So, if you want to read a book as it's being written, in rough draft form, click here for the PDF (chapter one).

As well, the audiobook version of Bee Balms & Burgundy is now at the studio being mastered. Thus, it should be available to all in the next two weeks. You'll want to pick it up, as it may be the best audiobook you'll hear this year; it's a masterpiece, my friends.

Stupid quote of the week:

“It reminds me of being in the Army, even though I was in the Navy.”
- Baseball great Yogi Berra, when discussing the Broadway musical Biloxi Blues

Until next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Random Thoughts

2008-01-25T19:38:00.000-08:00

Here are some of my latest musings.

After listening to XM Channel 5 (the 50’s) for the past couple days, I’m left with these two thoughts:

• What song, do you suppose, was playing on the radio of James Dean’s Porsche 550 Spyder when Donald Turnupseed ran him off U.S. Route 466 and subsequently killed Dean?

• Who was sexier, Audrey Hepburn or Grace Kelly? Truth be told, I wish I’d bedded both…at the same time.

Current Affairs:

• Although many case studies estimate that one out of every four Americans—25% of the populous—is now mentally ill, a friend of mine, an MD, told me she believes the number to be much closer to 50% of all Americans. So, the next time you’re bitching and complaining about the guy that just cut you off in traffic, you just might be right when you scream, “You’re out of your mind, idiot!” Then again, it just may be you that’s missing a few screws upstairs, at least according to the estimates.

Have a great weekend.

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Autumn Reads & Reviews

2008-01-15T01:45:00.000-08:00

I decided to keep a log of the books I read from quarter to quarter, to be reviewed and posted by the 15th of each following month. Why? I don’t know. It just seemed like something to do. Some of these titles I find online, some in bookstores, and some at flea markets/garage sales. Some are stupid little reads designed for ESL programs, others are mainstream bestsellers, and still others are bona fide classics. I’ll pretty much read anything that peaks my interest upon first site.

Now, autumn is always a busy time for me, and that includes reading. So, I don’t know if I’ll be posting this type of quantity each quarter (I have yet to read a book since the holidays), but nonetheless…

Nellie P’s Autumn (Oct/Nov/Dec) 2007 Reads & Reviews:

• Act of Treason; Vince Flynn (Loved it)
• Dead Cold; Sue Leather (Garbage, but I didn’t know so until I was well into it.)
• Ill Wind; Nevada Barr (Another strong title from an ingenious serial storyteller.)
• Jennifer Government; Max Barry (Pretty good, funny, but trite at times.)
• Lions of Lucerne; Brad Thor (Thor’s best? Perhaps better than his actual talent.)
• Meet Me in Istanbul; Richard Chisolm (I loved this simple little story; good fun for the open-minded reader.)
• Officially Dead; Richard Prescott (Good read, in my opinion.)
• Past Mortem; Ben Elton (Excellent. I like this guy's tempo.)
• The Black Cat; John Milne (I loved this simple little story; good fun.)
• The Sigma Protocol; Robert Ludlum (As good as the Bourne serial; captivating.)
• White Noise; James Ellroy (Good story; I don’t like Ellroy’s cheeky descriptive style.)
• Anna Karenina; Leo Tolstoy (Vastly overrated, even for it's time. It think "shock value" contributed to its lore.)
• L.A. Confidential; James Ellroy (Ellroy tries to be too hip with his narrative.)
• Path of the Assassin; Ben Elton (Entertaining story but terribly cliché.)
• Playing for Pizza; John Grisham (Fun and inviting if not simple.)
• Portuguese Irregular Verbs; Alexander McCall Smith (Rather listless.)
• Protect and Defend; Vince Flynn (Drags a bit here and there, but it’s nice to see Mitch back in action.)
• The Old Man and the Sea; Ernest Hemingway (Halfway through this book, I thought, Overrated! By the end, I got it. What a beautiful, sublime story of chivalry and self-realization. Hemingway was a god, plain and simple.)
• The Scarlet Letter; Nathaniel Hawthorne (Remarkably taut for “America’s first novel.”)

Also, another installment from the Dumb-Ass Quotes Vault:

"I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I want all the kids to copulate me."
- Former Chicago Cub Andre Dawson, when asked about being a role model

Until next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Eye for an Eye?

2008-01-10T04:34:00.000-08:00

I saw a program on dog shelters this morning. In the aftermath, as a dog lover, I'm left with this question: If we can justify euthanizing a three-year-old collie for biting a child's hand as that child attempts to rip a half-eaten rawhide from his/her mouth, then can't we also justify euthanizing a child that severs a dog's head and sends it via post to that dog's guardian???

Remember: Both Hitler and Ted Bundy were once children; neither was ever a dog.

Stay safe.

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

In From the Fog

2008-01-07T23:12:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!! I know, I know, everybody says that, but...

Since my last post, I've celebrated X-mas Eve (the big day in my family), X-mas, my lady's b-day, New Year's Eve, and New Years Day. (Hey, only two more weeks to the next holiday!) Needless to say, I've had enough "joy" and "wishes" to last me until April. So, back at it...

As I endured the forty-minute drive home from my mother's house tonight—in a dense, metro-wide fog befitting of a Stephen King setting—I came to a conclusion: Just to thank everyone that dared to read my meaningless blog in 2007, I'm going to offer you a FREE read of Chapter 5 from my Bee Balms & Burgundy audiobook! (The audiobook is currently in production.) You can find them here.

Other than that, I've included in this post a wonderful entry from the Stupid Quotes vault, and a raw recipe designed to keep you warm on these frigid January evenings. Enjoy!

Quote:

"Could you play some Picasso?"
- Former NBA and Philippine Basketball Association forward Chris Morris to a piano player in a hotel bar.

Raw Recipe

(I recently came up with this. Let me know what you think.)

"Southwestern Turtle Salad"

You need a large bowl. (I've geared these specific instructions for what amounts to roughly a pint.)

Mix/toss the following:

• One cup soaked raw Black Turtle Beans
• 1/2 cup diced Red Tomatoes (make sure you get all the juice in here as well)
• 1/3 cup diced Red Bell Pepper
• 1/3 cup diced Banana Pepper
• One teaspoon shredded Cilantro
• Pinch of Cayenne Pepper

Toss/stir well, chill a bit, then serve.

Have a great week.

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Wish You Were Here

2007-12-23T21:50:00.000-08:00

This time of year always brings reason for sadness to so many. This year, I could certainly change my long-term holiday perspective of optimism and instead dwell on the fact that tomorrow evening (X-mas Eve here in the 'States) will be the first X-mas Eve in my entire life that I haven't spent dining, bullshitting, and exchanging gifts with my father, who is now deceased. I very well could dwell on it. I could. Then again, we all have a story; we've all lost someone or something (a beloved pet, perhaps) that leaves us wanting in the worst way; we've all been through that first T-giving and/or X-mas after a difficult break-up; we've all been privy to a family member enduring the same thing this time of year. So, no tears or heartache this X-mas, OK?

Instead, in your quest to layoff too many "unhealthy" holiday treats, why don't you give the following recipe a try. Trivial, I know. How does a smoothie mend your heart? It doesn't. (Well, not figuratively, at least.) But this really is a time of year to be a bit trivial, perhaps a bit simple and childish. (This is, after all, the time of year Santa pays all good kids a visit, right?)

Now, you'll need a blender, but trust me, this smoothie has the power to transport you from the snow and ice (you can use that description as a metaphor for the emotional doldrums, if you wish) to the sun-baked tropics (happiness or contentment, if looking for metaphor) in mere minutes.

I call this smoothie "Wish You Were Here." (Cheeky, I know. But it seems we all have to name our meals in this holistic/raw food realm. I'm not sure who decided that. I think it was raw food guru David Wolfe, so please blame him!)

Anyway, Nellie P's Wish You Were Here recipe:

1 cup strawberries
1 cup diced pineapple
1 diced mango
3 tablespoons raw coconut butter
8-10 oz. purified/spring water
Blend, chill, then serve for two.

Give that a try, and see if you don't wake up in Maui with a smile on your face the next morning.

In addition, find some time to intellectually run away from it all. Find a spot where no one can bother you for a few minutes. (A corner of the house, a hill overlooking the city, an empty park off the main drag, wherever.) Stare off into the labyrinth of lights, until you reach that foggy alpha state where you can actually see people you once knew and hear conversations of yesterday and tomorrow. Let your mind run away—allow it liberation. Perhaps you gaze into holidays past; perhaps you peek into the upcoming year, foresee it unfolding just as you wish. Perhaps you simply stare into the face of gratitude with a grin and an affirmative nod.

Please stay safe this week.

Until next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Home or Abroad?

2007-12-09T15:01:00.000-08:00

When does living abroad actually become “home” for the expatriate and his or her birth nation subsequently become “abroad”?

I recently spoke to a colleague that has been living “abroad”—or “overseas”—for more than twenty-two years now. He no longer carries a U.S. passport, although he was born and raised in America. When conversing with him the other day, he mentioned something about “life abroad.” I asked him what he meant. He explained: anything outside America…even though he hasn’t seen the Stars & Stripes in almost a decade.

So, I ask again: When does “abroad” actually become “home” to the expatriate and his or her birth nation finally become “abroad” or “overseas"?

Doesn’t it seem quit asinine to claim as your “home” a locale you neither visit nor long to visit just because you were hatched in such a place?

It does to me—even if it is a friend making such a claim.

~~~

This week's VBT dates:
i
Dec. 10th: Review; Book Worship
Dec. 11th: Guest Post; Author Talk
Dec. 12th: Interview; Book Marketing Buzz
Dec. 13th: Interview; Publishing Secrets
Dec. 14th: Interview; Snow's Place

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

A Tip-Toe Through Cyber Tulips

2007-12-03T00:26:00.000-08:00

I start a month-long virtual book tour (VBT) this week. The dates and locations for that first week are as follows:

Dec. 3rd: Guest Post; StoryCrafters
Dec. 4th: Interview/Review; Books by CP Murphy
Dec. 5th: Review; Sadie's Storylines
Dec. 6th: Review; Snow's Place
Dec. 7th: Spotlight; Buzz the Book

If you find time, pay me a visit.

Otherwise, have a great week.

Peace & Luv

NP

###

Pointless Pondering

2007-11-29T21:41:00.000-08:00

After a bit of pointless pondering, here’s an after-the-holiday thought from me to you:

We never get to choose whether or not we want to be an uncle or aunt; it’s hurled upon us, as we have no say in our siblings’ bedroom activities. In a way, it’s a helpless feeling. I mean, if I wanted to be an uncle to but a niece and nephew yet I end up with seven nephews…

As well—after some additional pointless pondering—I also realized, perhaps for the first time in essence, that if one chooses not to be a father or mother, he or she has also, indirectly perhaps, chosen not to be a grandparent someday as well.

Hmmm.

Anyway…If you liked the last audiobook sample from Two for Tuesday, you can find another one here.

Stay real.

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read a sample of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

T-Giving Wishes!

2007-11-21T00:22:00.001-08:00

A time for thanks. Thus, I'd like to say I'm thankful that this is the first Thanksgiving without my father...instead of the tenth! I miss him, I still cry weekly in longing for just one more conversation with him, but I'm so damn thankful I had the time I had with him, and I'm thankful he never suffered in the end.

I'm so thankful that a dorky-but-beautiful, half-inbred, crooked-eyed puppy found her way to me a little over ten years ago; I'm thankful for the ways she changed me, for assuming the position of daughter in my life. I'm thankful I got the chance to receive her unconditional love for nine wonderful Thanksgivings prior, and that I had the chance (thanks to my Maker) to say a proper "goodbye."

I'm thankful my mother is still alive and healthy, that my siblings are prospering, and that I have the friends and lover I have.

And, I'm thankful as hell for YOU! So, I'd like to wish you—all our visitors (some 10,000 per month) along with all our readers—a very happy and nourishing Thanksgiving 2007.

And, as a show of our appreciation, we're offering you a listen to the first chapter of our Two for Tuesday audiobook, which is currently in production and slated for release in late-December. (Thanks to the vocal talents of Drew Birdseye and Lani Minella!)

Have a listen here:

Take care.

Nelson

###

Green for a Three-some

2007-11-12T19:18:00.000-08:00

In relation to my last blog post, I wanted to share a bit of information I ran across in the late-nineties.

Did you know that in 1997—two years before Panama elected Mireya Moscoso as its president—three women vied in a run-off for Ireland’s presidency???

Yep. In 1997, five candidates ran for the post, four of them women. Due to Irish rules about winning percentages, three were forced to run off for the title. Those three candidates were: the Fianna Fáil party’s Mary McAleese; the Fine Gael party’s Mary Banotti; and the Independent Party’s Dana Rosemary Scallon.

In the run-off, McAleese won the presidency, a post she still occupies today.

Now, want to hear something just a bit stranger? McAleese is the second female to be elected Ireland’s head of state.

The first?

The woman she replaced, Mary Robinson.

Can you picture such a thing ever happening in the yee-haw, backwards ass U-S-of-A???

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Cheers to You, Lovely Lady!

2007-10-30T16:11:00.000-07:00

Cristina Fernández de Kirchner (a beautiful Pisces woman with Moon in Taurus. Mmm, just my type!) was elected president of Argentina on Sunday, by the widest margin recorded since the 1983 elections. Argentina now joins nations like Panama, Ireland, Britain, and even Canada in electing women to their highest post.

Meanwhile, the “progressive” and “liberated” U.S. still trips over itself, trying to shed its closet-misogynistic, Christian white male fetish while ardently adhering to its closet-misogynistic, Christian white male fetish philosophy.

Although I know that Cristina herself is a former Argentina First Lady, my hope is that American can elect a woman other than a Hilary Clinton-type; I’m talking a real woman, an authentic woman, not a woman merely imitating a man (that kinda defeats the purpose of electing a woman, doesn’t it?)—a woman like you, my sister, my mother, my grandmother, any woman I’ve dated in my life and not simply some power-hungry thief and phony.

Today, let’s hope that at some point soon, a woman just like you steps up, announces her intention to lead the nation from its grandest soapbox, and then captures that nation’s heart in the process.

When that happens, perhaps we’ll all believe in America once again.

Until then, we can only eye Argentina from afar, witness her history-in-the-making glory, and say, “Cheers to you, lovely lady!”

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Love Plus One

2007-10-23T00:51:00.000-07:00

Love is always idealistic. I mean, no one is ever as deserving as we deem him or her to be. But so what? It’s love, you know? It’s still the best thing going. The love you have for your lady, your parents, your siblings, your dog or cat…if you take the time to really analyze it, love is always better than making your first million or being the best at what you do. Not a lot better, but better nonetheless. Success does have its virtues. It’s just that love has more; it always has more.

BTW: This week is the last week of National Breast Cancer Month—make it count and perhaps you'll ensure the future health of your mother, sister, wife, girlfriend, best friend, or neighbor.

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

The World's Best Anti-Aging Secret

2007-10-16T23:49:00.001-07:00

Beauty Tip of the Week:

OK, so I’m nearing my M.A. in Holistic Nutrition, and I’m a bona fide 100% raw vegan. Thus, from time to time, I enjoy forwarding to you useful information (and recipes) pertaining to the holistic/raw food lifestyle.

Now, want to live to be 125 and still feel great enough to make love to your mate (assuming he or she too is still alive at that age) twice a day??? (Remember, you’re probably really rich by that point and your kids are in their 90s and off on their own, so you have PLENTY of resources to relax your mind and plenty of time to subsequently devour one another a couple times a day! Mmmmmm.)

Well, then, let’s start our journey to 125 by:

• Eliminating all salt! Really, there’s no foodstuff worse for you than salt. Nothing! Don’t believe how bad salt is for you? Well, try pouring a bucket of it into your car’s gas tank. Now, if it does that to your car, what do you think it’s doing to you??? Get rid of the salt and sodium!! No table salt. No diet soda. And no tofu! (That stuff is LOADED with sodium!)

• Eliminate all refined sugar! Pretty much the same philosophy as the aforementioned poison.

• Eliminate all dairy. By this time you’re saying, “But, Nellie, what CAN I eat? You’ve taken everything away from me.” Uh, no, luv, I haven’t. I’ve taken the shit out of your diet, that’s all. According to raw food guru David Wolfe, that quart of skim milk, that block of cheese, that pint of yogurt and/or ice cream you love so much are all loaded with cow puss, steroids, antibiotics, added hormones, and all are pulled from an animal that moves less than 100 steps in its lifetime, is not once bathed, and stands in its own feces and urine 24 hours a day.

Dairy is foreign to your body, and it’s killed far more people in this world (indirectly, of course) than tobacco, alcohol, and drugs combined. Nothing clogs those arteries and trashes that colon quite like dairy, ya know?

• Consume lots of beta-carotene by way of dark green leafies (such as kale, collard greens, chard, romaine lettuce, parsley, spinach, etc.) In a future blog I’ll include a few recipes for awesome green smoothies that will allow you to consume massive doses of green leafies without ever really noticing them!

• Limit starches. (There’s nothing of value in starches. They’re simply a pollutant to your precious body.)

• Consume plenty of fruits, especially apples—try to eat at least three to four a day (preferably split between to mini meals). That’s all the fiber you’ll ever need in a day, and your heart will love you for it!

• If you can manage it, design your diet to consist of at least 75% fruits and vegetables and no more than 25% the other stuff. Your digestion, your joints, and your sharp little brain will be forever grateful.

So, you’re beautiful today, absolutely lovely. Yummy, I say. Now, let’s make sure you stay that way for another 80-100 years, OK?

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Stairway to Venus

2007-10-08T15:17:00.000-07:00

I say help her conquer the world; incessantly feed her that support. The more success she has, the less valuable time the two of you waste building her up. Instead, you can have intelligent conversations, make love, see the planet together. You don’t have to sit around and explain to her why you think she’s a goddess; deep down, she already knows—she’s conquered the world, remember?

And the more she accomplishes, the sexier she gets. Women are magic in that way.

Till next week...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Not Worth His Salt

2007-10-02T03:39:00.000-07:00

NP's thought of the week:

I’m not entirely certain any man is worthy of a woman’s love. But, as a man, you have to give it your best effort, because unless she’s a member of the GLBT, you’re her only hope.

Till next week...

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

As Wooing Withers

2007-09-25T02:43:00.000-07:00

He’s intimidated by your career, by your wants, by your ambition, by your fortitude, by your strength—even though he says he “only wants the best for you.”

He needs you to coddle him—day and night—because he’s “sensitive.” According to dictionary.com, “sensitive” means, among other things: 1.) aware of and responsive to the feelings of others. 2.) readily or excessively affected by external agencies or influences. Unfortunately, you’re dying for the former; he’s offering only the latter, as his manhood fractures at the slightest criticism, resistance, or disapproval.

Truth be told, in lieu of a mate or equal, you’ve unknowingly become your lover’s surrogate mother. Yeah, the new millennium man is a sniffling, pseudo-sensitive, insecure, modern male drip.

And you’ve landed yourself a ripe one.

You scratch your head and say, “Nellie, why is there no chivalry left in the world today?”

I exhale a mighty sigh and roll my eyes. “Why is there no chivalry in the world today, luv? Because, there are no real men left in the world today…

"Except in fiction.”

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter five of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Sacrifice the "Sacrifice"

2007-09-17T14:39:00.000-07:00

A sensual encounter is a wonderful metaphor for the manner in which society, as a whole, should work.

I’m not, nor will I ever be, a supporter of collectivism; it’s adolescent; it’s “peer-pressure” driven, much like high school. Individualism is our true nature; Darwinism does hold water.

Now, in sex—the way it’s supposed to be—there’s a common goal serving the mutual benefit of both individuals. Even the woman that will do anything to please her man, the one that will go forty ways from Sunday and from head to toe for the sake of her guy, is doing such so that she will, in return, be loved, adored, and appreciated. Just like the worst sex you'll ever have, the best sensual encounters too are completely selfish—they’re always selfish.

So, forget the tired term “sacrifice” when discussing "great" relationships; the term is, in matters of love, rancid bromide, at best. Truth be told, love, sex, and romance are—indirectly a times, perhaps—completely selfish...just like philanthropy is completely selfish. "Philanthropy, Nellie?" you say. Absolutely! The philanthropist only gives because it makes him/her feel good, perhaps even “worthy.” He/she might even offer his/her charity for no other reason than public recognition. Philanthropy’s actual root is selfishness. So too is the core of any sensual encounter, no matter how utterly satiating it may be for both participating souls.

It has to be that way. Why? When you and I both have something at stake—a need, a want, a burning desire—then we can best serve one another. If he/she gives you the orgasm of your life, if he/she makes you feel like a god or goddess via his/her affection and adoration, you’re going to return the gesture two-fold. Why? Because you want him/her to stick around and do it time and time again; it’s in your best interest to do so.

“Sacrifice” is sorely overrated. It may hold a relationship together on the surface, but it doesn’t satisfy both parties. And, if you’re not really satisfied, then what’s the point of the "relationship"???

When you have no incentive, when you’re doing everything simply for the collective cause, there’s no reason, there’s no purpose, and there’s absolutely no passion in it all.

And, really, what’s sensuality without passion???

Nada.

Till next week...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter four of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Lilly, the Construction Worker

2007-09-11T00:06:00.001-07:00

Who was the first and/or most influential feminist in American history?

Was it Roe vs. Wade pioneer-turned Born-again Christian Norma Leah McCorvey?

Was it Hippy Chick and former WAA Director Gloria Steinem?

Was it former Goldwater groupie-turned-First Lady-turned-Senator Hilary Rodham Clinton?

Perhaps we need to travel back in time a bit further; was it the venerable socialite Elizabeth Stanton and her Declaration of Sentiment?

I offer you a resounding “no”…to all of the above.

The first and most influential feminist in American history furthered women’s rights while she dared to call two of the most brilliant male minds of her time “best friends” as well. How pertinent was she? By the time Elizabeth Stanton’s Declaration of Sentiment was published and signed, America’s first and most important feminist had already lived 95% of her life, and she’d already loved, worked, spoke her piece, and changed the American woman’s destiny for the better—forever.

She wrote with uncanny eloquence, as well as anyone on American soil. She spoke with clarity and conviction, in a time when women simply weren’t permitted to do such. She thought in concise and intelligent manner, alongside the greatest American male minds of the day. She furthered the cause of all women on U.S. soil less hostility and armed with relentless tact.

So who was she? Well, those two aforementioned “best friends” just happen to be Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau…

And that extraordinary woman—America’s first and most influential feminist—happens to be…

Transcendentalist and Editor of The Dial Margaret Fuller.

Till next time...

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter three of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Liquid Love

2007-09-06T10:35:00.000-07:00

This delightful chocolate shake recipe is designed to "caress you from the inside out." And, keep in mind, it's a raw food recipe, so it's completely healthy for you. In fact, you're not only stirring your love nature with this authentic chocolate smoothie, but—believe it or not—you're actually detoxifying your body as well!

You’ll need a blender. Then, place the following items in the blender:

• Three Bananas
• Five teaspoons Raw Cacao Powder (add more if need be)
• Two tablespoons Maca
• One cup Goji Berries
• One cup Strawberries
• 16 oz. Purified/Spring Water
• Blend then chill in blender pitcher
• When properly chilled, pull from fridge and blend for ten seconds
• Serve

Then, drink while you read a great love story!

Till next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter two of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])

Why She Rocks

2007-08-28T22:01:00.000-07:00

NP’s Thought of the Week (Probably the Only One I'll Have):

Simply put, 99.9% of the world’s horror is caused by the male gender. War, murder, rape, genocide, apartheid, molestation, domestic abuse, you name it and 99.9% of it can be traced to the male gender. There's no way around it.

Yet, most men still doubt her goddess status.

I don't.

She is better. The facts ardently concur, and any real man takes note of them.

Till next time...

Peace & Luv

NP

###

If you enjoy strong-but-feminine women, sexy love stories, hot romance stories, romantic fiction, romance novels, sensual fiction, women's fiction, sentimental fiction, great novellas, award-winning fiction, Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, or Richard Paul Evans, you can read chapter one of Nelson's Bronte Prize-winning novella, Bee Balms & Burgundy, right now for free HERE. (See for yourself why it beat out Nicholas Sparks, Nora Roberts, and Richard Paul Evans, among others, for the title of "North America's Best Love Story of the Year." [Bronte Prize results are HERE.])